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'My Baby Lived for One Minute After Miscarriage—I Regret Not Holding Him'

'My Baby Lived for One Minute After Miscarriage—I Regret Not Holding Him'

Summary

A woman shares her experience of having a miscarriage at 17 weeks and how her baby lived for about one minute after birth. She did not hold her baby at that moment but reflects on the emotional difficulty and the need for better support for parents experiencing pregnancy loss.

Key Facts

  • The woman was 17 weeks pregnant when she learned she would have a miscarriage.
  • She spent three days in the hospital, from Monday to Wednesday, waiting for the baby to be born.
  • Her baby lived for about one minute after birth.
  • A nurse held the baby because the mother felt she could not.
  • She experienced mixed feelings, including guilt, shame, and dissociation during the miscarriage.
  • There was little guidance from hospital staff on how to handle the moment or prepare her emotionally.
  • She declined religious support but spoke with a social worker, who was not able to provide the help she needed.
  • Reflecting back, she wishes someone had encouraged her to hold and say goodbye to her baby.
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